


And I'd do anything to make you stay

by ladyhawke



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Minor Bruce Banner/Thor, Minor Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Minor Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Past Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Reconciliation, Reconciliation Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-19
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-23 02:24:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17071688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyhawke/pseuds/ladyhawke
Summary: It was a cell phone.Just a cell phone.It was a crappy, outdated flip phone. Tony's real phone made this one look like garbage. There was no smart tech on it. There were no cool functions. Hell, it only had one number in it.So why was it always with him? Why did he cling to it when he was scared, or frustrated, or lonely? Why was it always with him? Why did he brush his fingertips against it while he slept and Pepper was clear across the bed, a huge space between them? They were engaged for Christ’s sake and he didn't touch his fiancee half as much as he touched the stupid cell phone.





	And I'd do anything to make you stay

**Author's Note:**

> This is my fix/take on what should happen between (or during) Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: End Game. 
> 
> Title is from "No light, No light" by Florence and the Machine, which heavily influenced this piece. 
> 
> Please leave kudos and comments!! Stony forever!!

It was a cell phone. 

Just a cell phone.

It was a crappy, outdated flip phone. Tony's real phone made this one look like garbage. There was no smart tech on it. There were no cool functions. Hell, it only had one number in it. 

So why was it always with him? Why did he cling to it when he was scared, or frustrated, or lonely? Why was it always with him? Why did he brush his fingertips against it while he slept and Pepper was clear across the bed, a huge space between them? They were engaged for Christ’s sake and he didn't touch his fiancee half as much as he touched the stupid cell phone. 

Sometimes he wanted to throw the crappy thing off the top of Stark Tower, let it smash into a million pieces and that one phone number would be lost forever. 

Pepper knew he always had it. She probably knew he was clutching it in his pocket when he had proposed to her. It was something they didn't talk about, better to pretend it wasn't there. 

If it caused so much damn trouble, why did he keep it? 

Because it was all he had left of Steve Rogers, the love of his fucking life. It was the last physical tie connecting them. He knew if he called that number, Steve would come running. But he never could. Or would. Tony felt like a goddamn coward with a broken heart. 

Now his life revolved around the cell phone. 

He set the wedding date close so the word would never reach Steve in time for him to attend. Tony was trying to move on so desperately but he knew if he saw Steve again, even if Tony was standing with Pepper in front of a judge, all would be lost. He would fall at Steve's feet, grab him and never let go.

He loved Pepper, yes very much, but not in that all consuming way that he loved Steve. Tony told Pepper he dreamed they had a child and it felt real. What he didn't tell her is that he used to have the same dream about he and Steve. Only recently did she appear in Steve's place. 

Even after Steve left with that bionic asshole, he would dream he and Steve were happy. They had children, a boy that looked like Steve, sweet and strong with sandy blond hair. They had a girl that looked like Tony, precocious eyes under her mop of black hair. The swell of joy in him almost hurt it was so strong. It was real. Their laughs were real, their voices calling to him. Steve's hand was solid in his. When he woke up and saw the blue sky, he thought of Steve's eyes and would want to tell him. But it wasn't Steve in his bed anymore. It crushed him every time. 

When it was quiet, just he and Pepper alone at night, she would ask him if he was happy. His brain would flash to Steve, his body and soul would scream no, he was miserable. But he gave her his most dazzling smile and say “of course”.

In the irony of ironies, the fate of the world depended on him calling Steve and all he could do was stare dumbly at the screen. As menacing aliens crashed down into New York City, again, he couldn't call in Captain America.

Everything happened so fast after that. A battle. Jumping on a freaking spaceship. Meeting aliens and humans on a destroyed planet. Another battle and losing….people. Tony couldn't really bare to think too long about it, or else he might fall apart. Just him and an alien woman, who seemed more cyborg than organic, made it back to Earth. And all without the cell phone that had become his security blanket. 

On the trip back, Tony was able to jury rig the communicator on the ship to get in touch Bruce. They shared their stories of unprecedented loss. Bruce listed of the names of their friends that disappeared like a grocery list, shock still not worn off.

“Cap's alive.” Bruce said softly, like he knew that's really what Tony wanted to hear.

Tony let out a shaky breath, the tightness in his chest finally relaxing. Thank whatever deity let Tony have this small victory. If Steve would have been gone….no, can't think about it.

“And Pepper.” Bruce added quickly. “But she left New York. Went to California.”

So much was fucked up and there was nothing he could do. 

Yet.

He'd figure something out. He could fix this, he just needed to get home. 

“Tony.” Bruce's voice broke Tony’s train of thought. “Look, I know you probably don't need life advice right now, especially from me. But if recent events have shown me anything, it's that we need to take happiness where we can get it and stop worrying about all the bullshit.”

Bruce knew him too well, damn their science bro connection.

“That so? You taking your own advice, Lone Ranger?”

“Actually..” Bruce laughed in a shy way.

“What? Really?” Tony was a little shocked that Bruce was actually letting someone in, maybe this really was the end of the universe. “Do I know them?”

“Yeah, I don't think you'll believe me.”

“Oh c'mon.”

“I'll tell you the whole story when you get back.”

“You better.”

Landing at the Avengers compound was a relief. Not that anyone was really safe anymore but the false sense of security was nice. Bruce greeted them with the other remaining Avengers, in addition to a talking racoon who was just delightful. Steve's absence was painfully obvious. 

“He's been working on intel with some former Shield agents” Bruce must have seen him searching, had he been that obvious? “He'll be back tonight or tomorrow.”

The group started swapping war stories before too long. Tony excused himself to his rooms, he hadn't talked to Pepper yet.

Bracing himself, he called her on a large video screen. Her face appeared, bigger than life size and looking as weary as he felt. 

“I'm glad you're safe, Tony.” She said, tears in her eyes. 

“I'm glad you're safe too, Pep.” Tony said, waiting for the blow.

“How do you go from talking about a family to jumping on an alien spaceship that may or may not result in your death?” 

“I didn't think, you know me, I just gotta do what I gotta do.” Tony tried to joke but it fell flat.

“Yeah.” Pepper said. “We all have ‘gotta do what we gotta do’. I'm sorry Tony but I'm done. I can't. I just can't. “

“I know. I understand.” Tony felt deflated, even though he knew it was coming. “I want you to be happy and I don't think you could be with me. I love you though, I do.”

She nodded, tears streaming down her face. “I love you too but we both know your heart was somewhere else anyway. It's just better this way.”

Tony sighed, she was right, like always.

“We can still be friends.” She said. “I'll need time though.”

“Yeah. I get it.”

“Goodbye, Tony.”

“Bye.”

The screen went dark and he went straight for the bottle of scotch in the corner. Two quick glasses later, he felt strong enough to take a shower. 

The shower was scorching and wonderful. As he got his pajama pants on, he felt numb and relaxed. He might be able to sleep soon. Tomorrow he would get to work, not tonight. 

A knock at the door startled him, part of him forgot he was at the compound and not the tower so other people were actually around. 

He opened the door to see a weathered, bearded, and fucking beautiful Steve Rogers standing in his doorway. Seeing him was a weird combination of feeling like a kid on Christmas and being punched in the gut. He had been so worried about jumping on Steve, or doing something equally embarrassing, when he saw him yet now he was paralyzed.

“Can I come in?” Steve asked, the weight of the universe in his voice. That fucking voice, it undid Tony just like it always had.

“Yeah, my home is your home.” Tony stepped aside to let the other man in before shutting the door. 

Steve looked at him, arms crossed, his blue eyes looked dark and turbulent. “I'm happy you're home.”

The phrasing made Tony wonder if Steve meant Earth or back in the place they built up together, where they had been together.

“I'm glad you survived the snap heard round the universe but you don't seem too happy.” Tony said before he could think it might piss Steve off.

“Of course I'm happy, Tony, there's just a lot of other stuff going on. Not to mention I'm still processing the fact that you were on another planet and almost died.”

“Like you wouldn't have done the exact same thing, Rogers.”

“That's different.”

“Why is it different? Because I'm not genetically modified? I forget sometimes that I'm just a fragile human living among gods.” Tony scoffed.

“Not what I meant and you know that.” 

Tony did. He was just being obtuse. Anger kept the overwhelming urge to kiss Steve at bay.

“I'm sorry about Bucky.” Tony said, trying to sound sincere.

“Thank you but I don't really want to talk about him.” Pain was evident on Steve's face.

“Why not? He was better than me, I thought you would want to discuss his greatness or something.” It was low and hurtful and he couldn't help but say it.

“He wasn't better than you, he needed more help than you.” Steve said in a tight, low voice. 

“Goddammit, Steve. I needed you and you left with him.” Tony's voice was raised. “You left me. I thought..well, forget what I thought because it was wrong.”

“Tell me what you want me to say, Tony.”

“Did you fuck him?” Tony's mouth was leading him on a suicide mission.

Steve gave him a leveled stare. “What about you and Pepper? How's the wedding coming along?”

Rogers had gotten salty. Tony guessed all that had happened to the other man had worn on him. 

“Fine. We're both assholes but you started it.” Tony said, sounding like a petulant child even to his own ears. “And it's over between her and I, FYI.”

“I didn't come here to fight.” Steve rubbed his face. 

“I guess we just bring that out in each other.”

Steve shrugged. “We do. We also bring out good in each other. We have to work together on this Thanos thing.”

Tony nodded. He was being petty with his own bullshit when they had a real crisis on their hands. “You're right. We'll start in the morning.”

“Okay. Good.” Steve started towards the door. 

Tony wanted him to stay, there was no way he could say that so he said the next best thing. “Are you still painting?”

Steve stopped and gave a little laugh. “It's kind of hard to find decent art supplies when you're on the run.”

“So no.”

“No. But I draw when I can.”

Steve liked any kind of art, Tony knew that, however painting was his favorite. Drawing was like cake and painting was like icing. He'd been without icing for years then. 

“Maybe try to paint while you're here. We have a lot to do but it might be nice to paint something beautiful, so we all remember what this fight is about.”

Steve stared at him. “The real reason I came here tonight was to see you and tell you I love you. I love you more than I can say, more than anything I have ever known. We're not going to ride off in the sunset together, I know there's too much baggage for that, but you had to know. After all of this insanity, I couldn't stand the thought of me dying and you not hearing how I felt about you.”

Tony was numb or in shock or both, for once he didn't have a comeback on the tip of his tongue.

“You don't have to say anything.” Steve said. “I just needed you to know that you are everything to me, no matter how long we've been apart.”

Then he was gone, out of the room, leaving Tony in his stunned silence.

The next few weeks went by in a blur of activity. On the one hand everyone was always busy, working on simulations, finding intel on the stones, scouting to see where Thanos may have gone, and repairing damages done by battle. On the other hand Tony felt they were no closer to the purple dickwad than they were when they started. They were just spinning their wheels. 

The silver lining was getting lost in his work. Collaborating with Bruce again was nice, the other scientist had such a calm energy compared to Tony’s chaoticness. Plus, Bruce actually seemed happy, which was different for the usually somber man. It wasn't until Tony saw Bruce and Thor approaching the lab, and Thor drew the other man into his arms and kissed the living daylights out of him, that Tony put it all together. Bruce walked in with a huge grin on his face until Tony corned him, demanding to know exactly what had happened during Bruce and Thor’s Space Adventure.

After Bruce explained it, he looked sheepishly at Tony. “See, I told you before you wouldn't believe me. How does a god like him fall for someone as messed up as me?”

“No, you're being too hard on yourself.” Now that Tony saw the two men together, it really made sense. “You guys are perfect for each other, mazel tov.”

He was truly happy for his friend, even though it made him feel all the more lonely. Tony thought about his own experience in loving a god. He never understood how he hooked Steve either.

After a long night of working on his armor, Tony went back to his room, brain still whirling with his schematics that he barely registered his door was ajar. Pushing it open with a little caution, he peeked in. 

Steve was inside, leaning against the foot of the bed, obviously waiting for Tony. He wasn't wearing his uniform for once, just a plain white shirt and jeans. Relaxed and basic, still looking amazingly gorgeous. His longish hair was slightly wet and combed back. Must have finally taken a moment for himself and showered. 

It was kind of strange seeing him like this. Occasionally they had worked together or discussed the mission recently yet they were never really alone together, not like this. Everything had been very professional, maybe some friendly banter, no fighting or blowouts. It was as if they ensured other people were always in the room. It kept them in check, for better or for worse. Although, even if the room was packed with people, he felt the space and tension between them, like an invisible tripwire.

“Hey Tony.” Steve said with a smile but his eyes still showed how tired he was. “I hope it's okay that I'm here...I thought you would be back here at some point tonight.”

“Ain't no rest for the wicked.” Tony said, returning the smile and closing the door. “It's fine. Can I get you something to drink?”

“No, I'm good.” Steve uncrossed his arms and leaned back a little. Tony could see Steve's muscles roll under the thin fabric, pecs almost accentuated by it. Tony's pulse quickened just a little. 

Maybe Tony needed a drink. 

“Do you wear stuff like that around the new recruits?” Tony half-joked. “I bet you'd cause a scene.”

Steve laughed. “Nah, I give them the uniform. That's what everyone wants to see. I save the civilian wear for my friends.”

It was so good to hear him laugh, better than anything he could remember.

“I'm sure that gets them in a tizzy too.” Tony said. Steve looked good in anything and who didn't have even a slight uniform fetish, especially when it came to Captain America?

The other man shook his head with a disbelieving grin, like Tony had just suggested they could win the lottery. 

“Oh, come on, don't tell me you forget how devastatingly handsome you are.” Tony said with a flirty smirk.

“You haven't been around to remind me.” Steve said. 

Probably meant as a joke and not an invitation, yet Tony wasn't sure.

“Is that why you were waiting for me?” 

For a moment Steve only stared at him, maybe the cat got his tongue. “Actually, I wanted to show you something or give it to you, if you want it, that is.”

The nervousness suddenly coming off of Steve was palpable. A long time ago Steve would get this way around him, before they really knew each other.

“Yeah? Business or pleasure?” 

“I took up your advice to paint in my downtime, so I wanted you to see how it turned out.” 

On floor propped next to Steve was a large canvas. Tony would have noticed it if the other man wasn't so distracting. 

Picking it up, Steve walked it to the dresser in front of Tony, spun the picture around, placed it neatly, then took a step back to stand next to Tony. They were standing close enough that Tony could feel the heat radiating off of Steve.

Tony looked at the painting and it took a moment to process. It was stunning and expertly done, where it appeared more like a photograph than a painting, yet somehow more alive. It was the subject matter that left him…  
speechless….  
dumbfounded….  
awestruck.

The painting was of Tony. Tony in his lab tinkering with Iron Man armor, grease smeared on his face and hands, his hair slightly messy. The observer was hit full force with Painting Tony’s smile, not a smirk or grin, but a full on radiant smile of love and joy. Even his eyes seemed full of the emotion, like it was just pouring out of him. 

“I hope you like it.” Steve said, still nervous. “I painted what you said to, something beautiful and worth saving. You can have if you want, or not, whatever.”

“It's…” Tony struggled to find the words, and to not let all of the emotions bubbling inside out. “Um, it's unique. No one has ever captured me like that before.”

“That happened once. That exact scene.” Steve said, pointing at the portrait. “We were talking about something. I made you laugh and that is how you looked at me. I'll never forget it.”

Tony remembered that day. He was so in love with Steve. Seeing it from this view, seems like everyone else could see it too. Before Bucky, before loneliness, Tony had thought he would feel like Painting Tony for the rest of his life. Before his heart had shattered into a million pieces, he had felt for Steve what he never had for anyone else. 

Or ever would again. 

“Well, I'll go, let you think about.” Steve started to move towards the door.

“Stay.” Tony managed to whisper. 

Steve looked unsure. “Really?”

“I'll do anything to make you stay.” Tony said louder. 

In a flash Steve was in front of him, eyes burning into Tony with a violent intensity. How could those baby blues be so dark?

“Tell me again.” Steve said, voice a low rumble.

Tony’s eyes darted from Steve's eyes to his lips then back, his heart racing. “Stay.”

Almost before Tony could get the word out of his mouth, Steve's lips were against his. 

All that pain, all that longing, all that time...It was all erased, blown away when their mouths met. They were back to the time before, when they belonged to one another.

“It's always been you, Steve.” Tony huffed between kisses. 

Steve moved his mouth down Tony’s throat, the new beard provided delicious new sensations.

“Even before I met you, you were the gold standard. No one else compared.” Tony was breathing quickly and struggling to say everything he needed to, everything that he had kept to himself for so long. “When you were actually real and in front of me in all your glory...well, you were the only one.”

Their clothes came off by both of their efforts, Tony’s shirt the last item to be discarded. The perfection of the naked man in front of him was everything Tony remembered. When you see art made flesh, it was a hard thing to forget. 

“Tony…” Steve's voice was quiet, quavering. His hand reached to Tony’s torso, the wound he got on Titan still red and angry. It was a mangle of new skin, scar tissue building, and dark bruises - although it was ugly, it was a hell of a lot better than the original gaping hole. 

He had seen it so often he sort of forgot how shocking it could be for a first time viewer. Steve's face was a devastating mix of horror, pain, and sorrow. Tears stood in Steve's eyes, seeing the evidence of how close Tony had come to death. 

“Oh, Tony.” The super soldier’s voice cracked with emotion as he fell to his knees.

Tender kisses from Steve's lips covered the sore. Against the tender skin, Steve whispered a prayer of “I'm sorry” over and over again.

“We're okay.” Tony said, petting Steve's grown out hair, battling his own tears. He wasn't sure if he meant they were okay as individuals or as a pair. It didn't matter, he guessed either way conveyed the meaning. “We're okay.”

Steve nodded as he stood back up, wet streaks evident on his cheeks. 

Tony wiped them away, “We're okay.”

Their eyes met, then they were kissing again, as if their lives depended on it. Oxygen didn't matter anymore, just inhaling the other man, that's all he needed.

Movement happened around him, to him. Weightlessness as Steve's hands grasped Tony’s ass, lifting Tony onto the bed, laid him against the pillows. Steve's body a heavy, wonderful weight on top of Tony. It was calming in a strange way, being slightly crushed yet feeling utterly safe.

The kiss broke, Steve's lips wandered away to find Tony’s neck. Specifically that certain spot between jawline and ear that made Tony pant, and latched on. Tony’s eyes rolled back and his body arched against the other man. Not only did it feel sublime, it also would leave a mark and that stoked Tony’s fire. He wanted marks all over, physical reminders for everyone to see that Steve owned him. Hell, maybe he should just get “Property of Steve Rogers” tattooed across his forehead. That would definitely get the point across.

Stretching out his right hand, Tony reached for the nightstand drawer. Lube, they desperately needed lube. Fumbling for a moment, his fingers closed around the familiar bottle shape. Removing one of Steve's caressing hands, Tony shoved the bottle into it, trying to illustrate what the next step was going to be.

Without a word, or breaking bodily contact, Steve opened the bottle and his coated fingers were pressing into Tony. He wrapped his arms around Steve, pulling the larger man’s face to his. Cold shock and uncomfortable stretch gave way to that wonderful feeling of penetration. One finger moved quickly to two. The twinge of pain only added to his desire. Sometimes pain meant death or illness but sometimes it is a reminder of life.

Tony was alive. Steve was alive. He wanted to push their life forces together, combine their bodies and souls to thank whatever being allowed to be with one another again.

Rotating his body, Tony lined up their bodies, both men on their sides to face the other. He rocked his hips on Steve's fingers, in turn rubbing his cock against the Steve's belly. 

Needing more, Tony hooked his leg over Steve, working as close as he could. No, they could get closer. In a tangle of body parts, Tony shifted them until Steve was on his back and Tony sat astride him. Fingers pulled out of him, replaced by something bigger and blunter and just what Tony craved. 

Exquisite pain and glorious relief washed over him as he sank down onto Steve's sizeable length. Before either man could really adjust to the overwhelming sensation, they were both moving. Steve thrust up into Tony as Tony rocked down, their movements beautifully complimentary. 

One night stands could be hot. First times with a new love could be great. But this? Being with a partner who knows your body almost as well as their own, and knowing them as intimately, is the absolute bees fucking knees.

In tandem they worked their bodies. Steve's one hand gripped Tony’s hip with brutal force, guiding the rhythm as Tony loved it when he did. His other hand wandered all over Tony’s thighs and caressing his cock. 

Tony dragged his fingers down Steve's chest, tugging roughly on Steve's nipples because he knew that was one of the man's guilty pleasures. Tony knew the angle to tilt his hips and Steve mirrored with a piston of his cock against Tony’s sweet spot.

For once in his life, Tony’s mind was blissfully blank. Everything was just sensation, feeling guiding him. His skin felt semipermeable, so thin that Steve’s skin, sweat, and essence flowed in to Tony. And Tony flowed back. 

The universe melted away to them, locked in a primal embrace of need. 

Almost from far away, Tony could hear Steve murmuring Tony’s name over and over. Trying to focus his eyes, Tony looked at Steve. He tried to pour every ounce of love, lust, and feeling into that look. 

“Oh, Steve.” Tony managed to say. “I love you.”

He said it repeatedly until the words lost meaning. Until the his walls finally crumbled and he was cumming all over them both, releasing everything inside of him. 

A haze overtook him and he moved like he was underwater, slowly falling down to Steve to kiss him. At some point Steve must have joined him in the release because Steve rolled them on their sides to catch their breaths while lying close. 

Relaxed and sated, Tony rested but kept his eyes glued to Steve. He wanted to imprint every part of this moment in his brain. He never wanted to forget this sight, this feeling. 

“I love you, Tony. I’m never leaving you again.” Steve whispered with tears welling in his loving eyes.

“Never.” Tony promised.

They could fail in their mission. They could all die in a cloud of dust. 

But he would have this. He would have Steve. And Steve would have him.


End file.
